Newbie Noise

For the first time, when I heard about blogging, I was naturally curious. So when it was explained to me it is a kind of an online journal, I was HORRIFIED! “What? An online journal as in all the secrets I vowed to keep buried deep in my heart, on display on the internet. ”, toss in the cautionary tales of “kids, the internet is not a safe place to be.” It seemed unbelievable why anyone would want to spill all her “state secrets” in this land. When I duly voiced my opinion, a patient and somewhat exasperated reply paid tribute to my dramatics: “honey, a blog can be about anything, any interest, hobby or an issue one feels strongly about”.  After pondering over it as much as a thirteen year old possibly can, I relaxed. “So, it’s a way to say what I think?” “Yup, you got it,” was the relieved answer. The details since then and my twenty-something years now, are a bit fuzzy. 😀 but as a penance, I have considered myself one of the lazier species of the mankind ever since.

Now, I’d brag, the brilliant idea of becoming a blogger myself suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks one day, or less crudely put, a light bulb flashed red, orange and neon above my head. Nopes, that SO did not happen! Like a tiny, budding flower with little hopes of seeing the sunshine,it  bloomed late! Ah! Doesn’t that sound divinely poetic? After a bit prodding and persuading here and there, I finally put my foot down. “Hey you! Yes you the laziness bestowed onto me, you aren’t going to interfere.” Then, to celebrate, I pumped my fists, said my Bismillah’s and sat down.

“This is going to be easy peasy, I’ll simply have to provide an email, username, password”. After the three checks, I stopped. The new post field was staring expectantly at me. After a few minutes of a silent staring contest between me and the laptop screen, I was confronted with a moment of uncertainty (and revelation as Anne would put it). “What should I write? What is the most important thing for to write? ”, and then finally, the big one hit me, “Oh my god? Who am I?”

Shoving my laptop aside, I looked up at the ceiling. The slowly whirling fan seemingly hypnotized me since it could not have been the other way round. Somewhere from far away, the whistle of the train of thought blew. My heart leapt at the silent promise of salvation. “International issues? No, too serious. Political drama? Well, plenty of blogs there. Fashion? Hey, I couldn’t afford the lawsuit fee if a mislead person decided to sue me.” The cars of the trains passed. I tried to peer and discern THE ONE, you know, the kind furnished with oriental painting and cushy cushions. I would board and explore it and leave with a shining first blog post. Sadly, the train left a whirl of dust behind, leaving me sputtering and shouting instructions for it to come back, all in vain. My dear readers, its desertion left a burning desire for revenge. I was ready. When everything is a lost cause, the black *cough* hatred is what keeps the likes of me going, the other category being the mystifyingly angelic I-love-you-all’s.

Having decided the path I had to traverse, I stomped up to my sister. “Sister dear, I need a good name for my blog,” and hence started a volley of insults and giggles at each suggested name with each getting more and more ridiculous. Finally, the image of a poor baby blog looking up at me with its (imaginary) wide and near-tear eyes conjured up a sudden vision. I was the ice queen, condemning the birds to stay silent, the flowers to stop blooming and of course the bees to stop buzzing. “I shalt coat all the nectar with frost to unleash my revenge on this world”. As a result, a new blog was named and it rose from all the wrath and fury of the injustices it had suffered, even though at heart, it believes love and kindness are better weapons after all. (It seems to me it is highly ungrateful after all that I have done :D)

So, here’s my first foray into blogging. Stay tuned for more!